Here are some of my rambling thoughts on young (or old) men and courtship:

Get to know Dad.  Really.  Don't use him as a tool to get to his daughter.  If all goes well, he'll be your father-in-law and the grandfather to your children.  Respect him, too.  This takes a commitment that few young men are willing to submit to, I think.  The "courtship" model (perhaps spending plenty of time with her family, getting to know her with her family) can be a real aid here.  You're killing two birds with one stone, so to speak.

Jump through his hoops.  Othniel did.  David did. Even Adam did.  If he wants you to do some practically insurmountable thing--and the girl is worth it--do it.  And do it cheerfully.  Dad is probably looking at your attitude just as much as your achievement of said task.

Here are a couple of examples:  I know of a dad who insisted that his daughter's suitor read a list of books before the relationship progressed too far into the courtship.  These were books on theology, economics, relationships, and even literature.  What?  You can't read?  You won't read?  You won't educate yourself and become better, stronger, faster, etc?  Then, obviously that girl is out of your league.

I know of another dad who refused to let the courtship progress to engagement until the young man had bought a house.  Now, that's a hefty assignment in today's economy.  But think about it: the young man showed industry, frugality, and some smarts.  His future bride would have a place to live and a little financial stability if the marriage were to be  dissolved (through death, or God forbid, divorce).  Of course, a rising market and a little equity wouldn't hurt.  Am I saying that all young men should own a home before he gets married?  Nope.  But this father did.  And I'm happy to report that this couple is happily married (and enjoying their new home together) because this young man worked his tail off to comply with Dad's wishes--for the sake of a woman he loved.

Respect his rules.  Remember, this girl (one hopes) is going to be your wife.  You want her to be sweet, submissive, respectful, and obedient to you, right?  Then be a man and encourage her to submit to her father's rules for courtship, all the while cheerfully submitting to him yourself.  Think of it as a test:  if she obeys Daddy, then she has the practiced-obedience that makes her all the more likely to be a husband-honoring wife.

Don't be a jerk.  If you mess up (and you probably will), repent and resolve the problem.  And take your licking like a man--for the girl's sake, for your sake, and for the Lord's sake.  And don't think that the Lord cannot bring good things out of your mistakes--like reconciliation, peace, and a healthy dose of sanctification--because He can and sometimes does.

Kate Uttinger, a wife and mother of three lovely girls, writes for Leben magazine